LaToya M. Davidson-Perez

I’ve found that as I now become consumed by making a real go at being a sole proprietor, there are any number of things that fall between the cracks. Much like a mother who has tunnel vision taking care of her children, I have discovered that it is easy to lose track of hours and even days. I’ve been so busy that I forget to take care of myself. Sadly there are times when I have to ask myself if I’ve showered for the day, eaten or gone to the bathroom. I work from home so the temptation is always great to simply roll out of bed and immediately get on the computer. There have been plenty of times where I work so far into the wee morning hours that I completely forget how late it’s gotten. Even as my eyelids become heavy, I push through. Sure, it demonstrates that I have great work ethic, but I so quickly lose sight of what’s important.

No matter what your profession is we can sometimes get overly wrapped up in what we’re doing. For the past two months I found myself working every day and not taking full days off. It’s only after your body starts to rebel that you realize how important even one day off can be. You really need some personal time and some time to decompress. This weekend I discovered that I couldn’t even force myself to work. Even though the more I work the more I earn, something inside me told me that it was just time to stop. How easy it is to suppress our need to simply take a break. Two weeks ago my husband and I took a leisurely stroll around the neighborhood. We planned to make it a more regular occurrence. Well, that was two weeks ago. Read the rest of this entry »

It was both a joyous and a sad occasion. I sat in the most picturesque of locations, on a seafront gazebo, the wind gently blowing in my face. It was hard, impossible to keep the tears at bay. At my cousin’s wedding reception, on a perfect day, I wept at the life that was growing further and further behind me. I was wholly unaware that I’d let three years past since my last trip to our family home. Jamaica.

As I grow older I’ve learned to avoid many situations that bring me prolonged emotional turmoil. In doing so I managed to distance myself from my childhood home. I’d locked away a large part of me while staying away, and upon my return I faced the rude awakening I’d avoided for years. The Jamaica that I’d known was a place that in many ways no longer existed and in other ways, was still right there in front of me. No matter how much I tried to hide it, Jamaica, rather, my grandparents were still home to me. Read the rest of this entry »

I’d been trying to do this for years. And given my recent employment changes, it finally dawned on me that this was the best time to go out on that limb and become my own boss. How do you go from almost guaranteed compensation through a traditional job to championing being self-employed? That is something that I have just recently asserted as being the ideal choice for me and where I am in my life and career.

At the age of thirty-three I look back at my relatively short life and am proud of the accomplishments that are behind me. I have earned five college degrees and have already had a career that was over a decade long. I know that not many people, and even less who are my age, can make that claim. However, when I reached a monumental crossroads in my life a few months ago, I used it as an opportunity to assess what I was doing with my life and which path I would choose in this new phase. Nothing lasts forever, well, except for death and taxes. But you only get one life and it’s best to at least attempt live it to your personal fullest.

My husband was disappointed. Even now I still see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice. To him, I was throwing away all that I had and all that I’d earned to lead a new life and existence of obscurity and poverty. No matter how talented or strong that I was, he felt I was giving up on “finding a job.” It hurt at first, him questioning my decision, me knowing that it would mean big changes for us. I was conscientiously deciding to end my search for employment and officially throw myself into making my side business my primary one. Rather than feeling conflicted about it, it felt like the first lucid decision I’d made in my months of despair. I knew that it would be hard but I also knew that I was my biggest supporter and that I had the internal drive to do it. And while there have been many days that leave me stressed and worried, I remain realistic and determined. I know that I wouldn’t immediately step into making the income I someday hope to. In every job I’ve had and even now, I willingly put in the time and energy that is needed in order to achieve my goals. Read the rest of this entry »

All it takes is a little time and money and you too can change your moniker. And if you’re anything like me you’ll write an article lamenting on whether or not to change your name, to then leave it as it is and then to change it in the end. Sure, my previous reasons and justifications still hold true. However, a change of heart always comes before a big change. My change of heart came when I realized that I didn’t want to be called Mrs. Davidson the rest of my life.

It may seem a bit trivial but in my mind my mother is Mrs. Davidson. She always will be. However, as the gray hairs become more prominent on my head and southern sensibilities causes adult and child to call me missus, I started to view my name in a different light. As of May 15 I became LaToya M. Davidson-Perez. Actually, my IDs show my entire name, all five of them. It certainly wasn’t vanity that caused me to retain both my middle names and my maiden name, it was because no matter how much I tried to reconcile it in my mind, I am all five of my names. Just as I struggled to decide whether or not to jettison my maiden name and take my husband’s, I also found it difficult to say goodbye to any part of the person that I was and now am. Read the rest of this entry »

I’d like to think that I’m now in a more mature place to see what I couldn’t in my youth. I was plagued with a lot of personal insecurities and grandiose expectations in my adolescence that caused me to take much longer than I’d hoped to get to this point. In so many ways my late teens and 20s were a ceaseless roller coaster ride, one riddled with severe depression, anxiety and an abundance of self-loathing.

Sure, our teen years and our 20s are known for being trying times. They try the patience of our parents and we somehow believe that we’re super human and know more than we truly do. It’s a period of our lives that for many, upon living through them, are happy that they’ve since left it behind. I often complain to my parents, who were strict traditional Caribbean parents, that I didn’t get to really enjoy that period of my life. I felt pressure to do well in school, to adhere to our Christian upbringing and to never be an embarrassment. For the most part I felt like I succeeded. At least, I did so in part. I did well in school and tried to be cautious in my somewhat nonexistent social life. The pressure, it turns out, was mostly in my head. My mother married my father when she was 19. For as long as I could remember I’d always wanted to be a young bride. I saw the success of their marriage and felt that if I were to marry I’d do so at a young age and that I too would follow in their footsteps. Read the rest of this entry »